Do I have a sign on my back???

Ok, so this isn't going to be a very positive post, but hey, a girl's gotta be honest once in awhile, right? On my way home from work after about the thousandth car either pulled in front of me cutting me off only to drive ten miles under the speed limit I wondered if someone had put a sign on my back, or in this case on my bumper, that said something like this:

I am a very forgiving driver so go ahead, speed around me and then cut me off causing me to put my brakes on, then slow waaaaay down and never use your turn signal throughout the whole process, then ride your brakes all the while you are in front of me because hey, I love those pretty red lights anyway, speaking of which, make sure you slow down enough so I have to stop at that light after you've gone through the yellow light as it turns to red.

Or even before leaving work I think someone stuck this sign on my back:

When asked a question by this person make sure that you answer in perfect English, but in a language that is totally foreign to her, you know, like all acronyms and jargon only understood by someone in your line of work. This will surely incite her to ask more questions to which you can honestly reply that you have already answered them in a previous message.

Now that wasn't as bad as I thought it would be when I thought of all the stuff I could write about my Monday. Oh things aren't all that bad, just seemed to be a red light Monday when the day started out with things going wrong, but ended... well it's not over yet so I'll reserve judgement. I did coin a new phrase today when the email system wasn't working properly.... ready? I tell ya it's quite original..... Electronic Montezuma's Revenge!!! What'dya think about that?